Is a woman’s sexual desire before sex necessary?
A few years ago, scientists believed that for a woman to feel sexual arousal, she must first feel sexual desire. This refers to having sexual thoughts, feeling sexual urge and perhaps also have sexual fantasies. While this appears to be quite true for most men, recent studies have shown that is not the case for a significant proportion of women.
For example, the majority of women who are in a stable long term relationship typically engage in sexual activity without first experiencing sexual desire. In fact, many women begin sexual activity when feeling neutral.
However after they engage in sexual activity and after they receive adequate sexual stimulation and if they feel some degree of sexual pleasure, then sexual desire is triggered.
While the sexual desire of women is not necessary for them to engage in sexual activity, motivation is essential.
Motivation varies: it may be associated with the thought that sexual pleasure will follow, with the need to feel intimacy with her partner or with the tought that the partner will be sexually satisfied.
Motivation can also be associated with non sexual thoughts, for example, avoidance of a fight or have a favour from the partner.
What is usually the cause of reduced female desire?
Today we know that the problem of reduced sexual desire is the most frequently reported sexual problem of women. In most cases the problem is related to:
- Dissatisfaction with the couple relationship.
- Overall mental state.
- Fatigue and the lack of adequate sleep.
- Inadequate sexual stimuli.
When the reduction of sexual desire of women creates resentment, it is necessary to be treated as a whole, taking into account not only the sexual aspects, but also the woman’s social role, her mental health, and certainly the relationship.
Basson R (2002) Rethinking low sexual desire in women. BJOG 109: 357-363.
